There has not been a post here for a while and I don't want this blog to die just yet, so I will recount a few things that have been passing through my mind these past few days.
We have just celebrated Rosh Hashana, the start of the Jewish new year. It is a day of judgement, a day when we stand before God and ask Him to please, please, please write us down in the book of life for the upcoming year. As I was standing in shul (synagogue) during davening (prayer), I found myself thinking about Dr. Schwebel (or Lana, for those who prefer that). I was wondering - what happens to a soul on this day of judgement? Does it get judged, as well? Or was it judged when it passed on from this world up to God and now it is finished being judged? Does it get to interfere with our judgements on earth? Does a soul get to speak on behalf of a living person? And what happened last Rosh Hashana? Was Dr. Schwebel not written in the book of life? If you're written in the book of life, can it get changed sometime during the year or are you guaranteed to live out the entire year until next Rosh Hashana? These were my thoughts as I prayed and, for a period of time, my thoughts were on Dr. Schwebel, on how she was spending this Rosh Hashana, on how she probably - for the first time - was not being judged with the rest of us. It gave me the chills so I soon stopped thinking about it.
I just felt like sharing these thoughts with all of you, especially now, at the start of a new year. I anticipate what this year has to bring and I hope it is only good things, but I am also clinging to the past, to what happened this summer. And out of everything, that I do not want to let go of.